Ginuwine

A review of the album 'The Life

Once upon a time in a land far, far away called Washington DC there lived a boy called Elgin Lumpkin. This little boy was quite ambitious and he decided he wanted to become a soul singer. So, he set about this goal with great enthusiasm. The first step was to change his name. Elgin Lumpkin didn't really have a soulful ring about it and so the boy became 'Ginuwine'. A clever name for a soul singer, or so he thought. It rhymes with 'genuine' you see, which is sure to attract the ladies, yet it has a certain tough ring to it, he didn't want to exclude the boys.

After he had polished and practiced his smooth smoochy vocals to perfection, Ginuwine managed to get himself a record deal and released his debut album 'Ginuwine:The Bachelor' in 1996. Three years later he released '100% Ginuwine' and even had a hit single with his song 'So Anxious'.

Now in 2001 though our story is about to reach a conclusion. In my hand I hold Ginuwine's latest album, entitled 'Ginuwine - The Life'. On the inside of the CD cover the our hero wears a baseball cap and a cloak made out of what looks to be Dalmatian skins. Very smooth indeed. Also inside the front cover the boy states 'All success dedicated to Mommy and Daddy'. How sweet. I put the CD into my stereo. But here alas our fairy tale ends. No matter how many oohs and ahhs the boy puts in his music, no matter how many finger clicks, no matter how many soppy lyrics there is no getting away from the fact that Ginuwine is not genuinely talented in the art of soul music.

No, sadly Ginuwine is crap.

Niamh Grimes